Hire Minorities to express your Minority Opinions | We The Internet TV


[PATRICK] It’s just so terrible what
these cops are doing. [TARA] They’re destroying the
black community. [PATRICK] Honestly, at this point,
I would never call the police. It’s just not right. [TARA] Yeah, if everyone just
stopped calling the police, they wouldn’t have the opportunity
to harass black people. [PATRICK] What do you think, Ben? [BEN] Well, I think it’s complicated. Obviously there are issues of racism among individual officers, and possibly systemic problems
and perverse incentives in
police departments. But, a police presence is actually
what’s needed in high-crime communities in order
to prevent much higher fatality rates. So… [PATRICK] Wow, Ben. You clearly don’t understand what it’s like to be black in America. [BEN] And you do? [TARA] Are you alt-right or something? [BEN] What? (rewind sounds) [PATRICK] What do you think, Ben? [BEN] Uhh… [STEVE] Well, I think it’s complicated. Obviously there are issues of
racism with individual officers, and possibly systemic problems
and perverse incentives in
police departments. But an actual police presence
is what’s needed in high-crime communities in order to prevent much higher fatality rates. So, we have to hold
officers accountable, but it’s also important to
look at these incidents individually. Either way, vowing to not
call the police isn’t a realistic way to combat such a
multi-faceted problem. [PATRICK] But you’re black! [STEVE] That’s right, I am black. [TARA] Yes, Patrick, he is black.
And those are really interesting points. [BEN] But I just said that! [STEVE] Aww. Dear straight white guys, are you scared that your opinions
will be deemed wrong because of your race, gender,
or sexual persuasion? Do you want to be honest,
but MTV’s Decoded says
it’s problematic? Have you been told to
“stay in your lane,” or to
“stop mansplaining”? [MAN] Stay in your lane! [WOMAN] Stop mansplaining! [STEVE] It’s 2019, and you’re afraid
to say what you think. But we aren’t. [BEN] Who are you? [ALL] Political Opinion Surrogates! [STEVE] That’s right. Whatever your opinion… [JEN] We have a member of a
protected class who shares your views, and is ready to
express them for you. [MARK] That way, it won’t be
dismissed on account of you being… [MARGOT] …you. (music) [ANNOUNCER]
Political Opinion Surrogates. There when you need them most. Are you pro-life in the office? [BEN] What? [WOMAN] So you want to
control women’s bodies, Ben? [BEN] No, I don’t! [JEN] Unless you’re a man who
supports a woman’s right to choose, you’re not allowed to have
an opinion on abortion. [WOMAN] Exactly. [JEN] So let this
POS pro-life woman step in and express this controversial
opinion that we both share. [WOMAN] Wait, you’re pro-life? [JEN] That’s right. Woman to woman,
let’s talk babies, bitch. [BEN] I don’t think this is
appropriate in the workplace… [ANNOUNCER] Can you no longer
rollerblade in peace because you don’t think a DJ should
be forced to play a gay wedding? [BEN] What? [HOCKEY PLAYER] What’d you say,
homophobe? [BEN] I don’t remember… [MARK] Hush, child.
Let me handle this. A DJ shouldn’t have to spin his sick beats at a gay wedding if he doesn’t want to. [HOCKEY PLAYER] Okay okay,
you’re gay! [MARK] That’s right.
Come, come with me, child. [ANNOUNCER] Arguing trans rights
in the bedroom. (phone chimes) [BEN] Why are they texting me this
in the middle of the night? [MARGOT] Gimme. [JEN] Don’t worry, go back to sleep.
We got this. [BEN] Thank you,
Political Opinion Surrogates. [MARK] We’ll even speak for you in
your straight white dreams. [BEN] Great, good night! (music) [MARGOT] Dude, the glitter
is so unnecessary… [STEVE] Political Opinion Surrogates! We are marginalized individuals
ready to express your marginalized opinions for you. Call now. [ANNOUNCER] Warning:
Political Opinion Surrogates may not be effective when accused
of internalized misogyny, oppression, Uncle Tom-ism,
hysterical shrieks of terror, and most conservative, right-of-center, center, and left-of-center opinions. (music) [LOU] Hey guys, thanks for watching. If you enjoyed the video, don’t forget to like it, share it with your friends, and subscribe to our channel. Make sure to click the little bell to turn on notifications so you never miss a video. You can also follow us on Instagram and Twitter. And if you want to support us, check out our website: wetheinternet.tv

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